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Swim or ice skate? We’ll find out soon

It won’t be long before pools, lakes and other seasonal facilities will be opening for the summer, but I’m wondering if it will ever get warm enough to use them. Will we have to invest in ice diving equipment instead of bikinis (as if I would be caught dead in a bikini) and floats?

As I was getting ready for work Friday morning I wasn’t sure about the weather forecast, so I turned on the Weather Channel. After all, these days you need a winter sweater one day and a tank top the next.

It might be May, but to look at the national weather map, you’d never know it.

There, on the map, as plain as day, was a big streak of white running north and south across the middle of the country. Yes, it was snowing from Minnesota to northern Louisiana on May 3. I had to blink to make sure I wasn’t seeing things.

One might think it would just be flurries this late in the season – especially in the southern states. Nope, a Weather Channel reporter who was broadcasting from Missouri said three inches had fallen already. I think more was expected. Since leaves were already on many of the trees in that area, limbs were breaking and power lines were coming down as if it were the dead of winter.

It was bad enough when we had snow here in mid-April, but snow in Missouri on May 3? That’s ridiculous. I could overlook Minnesota, maybe, but not Missouri, and certainly not northern Louisiana!

The Weather Channel employees were freaking out. They’ve already switched to “severe weather” mode and it’s too cold for severe weather. They were lost; didn’t seem to know what to do. Maybe they need to pull the snow expert out of the box again.

And the storm chasers are all geared up for tornadoes, but all they’re getting is blizzards. What do you do with a blizzard when you’re a storm chaser? It’s not like they’re fast movers and hard to find. There’s just something about blizzard chasing that doesn’t have the same appeal as tornado chasing.

So, the weather has everybody in a tizzy and wondering what to do next. What do I wear? Do I bring out the lawnmower or the snow blower? Will the ground be white or green when I get up?

Nevertheless, Randolph Park will be opening its pool for the summer masses in a few weeks and it remains to be seen whether we’ll warm up enough to be able to get in the water.

The only thing for sure is that I won’t be wearing a bikini. …And everyone breathed a sigh of relief.



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